Monday, July 16, 2007

Moving…darkness…BarlowGirl

A new time in my life is coming up-I am moving once again! This time I am moving to Boryadanka-a small town (4,000 people) 53 kilometers north, northwest of Kiev.

Actually, all the missionaries minus the current Pastor (Eric and Tanya Bougie) and his wife are moving out. The Brinkerhoffs are moving to Kharkov, Marilyn is moving to Ternopil, and I am moving to Boryadanka. Weird, but we know this is His will for the church here at this time. They have been fed for so long, and now it is time for them to feed themselves, to step out into ministry and see what the Lord has for them, instead of us missionaries doing it for them. We have been seeing the nationals slowly begin this process, yet some are reluctant, scared, perhaps nervous about leading a ministry. With us here, no one will fully get out of their seats and start ministering.

BUT, in the meantime, my emotions are all over the place. To be honest, I see the other missionaries having a plan of action, mostly a place to live, while I wait and wait for the phone call “we have an apartment for you”. You see, Boryadanka being so small, not many people leave their homes for another, not many people move at all. It’s been a month and half since the Lord finalized His plan in my heart and in the Pastor’s heart in Boryadanka. Now I am learning all over again how to wait on the Lord. I seek prayer that during this waiting time, even if I am the last one here in Poltava; that I will continue to seek His face, and be on my face before Him daily. It’s a learning process, and sometimes the learning can be hard.

I was listening to this song by BarlowGirl. For me, it really ministered to my heart as this is where I am, in a dark place. But at this writing, the Lord has not led me through the dark place into His sun (Son) light, or perhaps I have not allowed the Lord to lead me out of the dark place. Unfortunately, being in this dark place is not only affecting me, but affecting others as well as they try to understand where I am and what is going on in me. Some think I am angry, to be honest, I’m not. Just in a dark place and I can’t seem to see the light although I know it is there. I try to be happy and put on a smile as someone said that a Christian who is depressed is looking at themselves and not at the Lord. Perhaps I am. All that I know is that I am in a dark place and I don’t like it!!!! I really desire to see Him in the morning. In the song, they sing “I feel the sun light on my face” and on the second chorus I would want to write that “I feel the SON light on my face” but then it’s not my song, nor my lyrics..so I leave it as written. Smile

I know that if I am patient, and real still, I will hear the sound of Angel wings….perhaps you will too.

Here are the lyrics to the song.

 

You Led Me

BarlowGirl

 

 

Good morning.

The night is over and gone.

I thought once, this dark would last for so long

Feel the sunlight

On my face

You have brought me

Through this place

Jesus, Jesus, You found me

Through the long night

You led me

You set me free

Do You see

Just what You’ve done in my life

You gave me

More than I hoped

For now I

Feel Your Son light

On my face

You have brought me

Through this place

Jesus, Jesus, You found me

Through the long night

You led me

You set me free

Feel the sun light

On my face

You have brought me

Through this place

Jesus, Jesus, You found me

Through the long night

You met me

You set me free

Good morning

The night is over

And gone

Posted by Vanessichka at 20:48:52
Comments

3 Responses to “Moving…darkness…BarlowGirl”

  1. Diana says:

    You will be just fine. As you know. It’s just the waiting. I’ve subscribed to your blog, so that I know when you write in it. I was going to e-mail you to tell you to do a post.

    Love ya,
    Diana

  2. Michelle says:

    All of you that honor the Lord and obey the words of his servant, the path you walk may be dark indeed, but trust in the Lord, rely on your God….Isaiah 50:10

  3. You are very very professional.I dream i could do such a great job as you do.

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